I decided Friday that I wanted to go to a movie whether someone joined me or not. I picked one I though H would like if he wanted to go and another I would go to if he didn't feel like going out. I asked D if she would want to go to either movie. She said she would go to the second one. When H got home, I told him about the movies I had picked. He decided that he would like to see the second one. When it was time to go, we called up the stairs to D. She said that she was not able to go after all. Her BF needed her to drive him somewhere. H was a bit upset. It bothered me some because it seemed as though he only wanted to go the movie because she wanted to go. Nothing more was said about that and we did have a nice time. H enjoyed the movie. I wasn't crazy about it, but enjoyed being out and I enjoyed the fact that he came with me and liked my choice of movie.
On Saturday, I did try to go off on my own a little during the party we were at. It was difficult because we were a small group in a small area. There were only about 15 of us. I did have a nice conversation with one lady while H was visiting with other people, though. It was good to have my own conversation. H joined in later. That made it more difficult for me. I have a hard time with more than two people in a conversation. When I think of something I'd like to say, I miss my chance to say it until it's too late. The topic has already moved on. Others jump in there with their comments before I do. I tend to wait until others have their say before I say what is on my mind. I need a long pause before I will speak my mind when there is more than me and one other.
I don't know if either of my attempts to do something on my own were appreciated by H or not. I think they were too small to have much of an impact.
We still haven't ML. I think H kind of wanted to last night. He put his arm around me when we went to bed. That usually leads to more. But he didn't do anything else after I snuggled up closer to him. I don't know if he was expecting me to do more or not. Should I have? Or should I wait for him to make more of an effort?
