Nothing much. A few interesting things.... wife and I had a bit of a row yesterday. Nothing big... but it is becoming apparent that she is more "attached" than I am. I was sitting back, watching her nearly come unglued. She even asked me, "Why are you smiling and not saying anything?" I resisted the temptation to say, "I don't care any more. This fight means nothing to me. Being married to you so something I do not enjoy. Your indecision is pushing me away, and I am indifferent on salvaging our marriage." I just told I am enjoying hearing her ranting. Of course, this made her angrier.
So she is in fact, still emotionally connected. And I suspect that she is sensing that I am drifting. Stay tuned.
OK, so remember in late Sept when she told me that she wants to file in mid/late October. When I asked what is the hurry, she said she does not want to spend the holidays with my family. So... Although the family on my side isn't doing anything big together for the US Thanksgiving holiday, she has surprised me that she hasn't spoken to her father about what he is doing. You know, if she's gonna rely on this guy to help her through our messy divorce, you would think she would at least talk to the guy (he lives about 200 miles away). I think two things are at work: First, guilt, guilt, guilt. It's eating away at her. Plus, if her dad invited her, he would explicitly invite me as well, so she would need to "drag" me along. So she is avoiding something difficult in her life. Ignore it and maybe it will get better or go away. Which is how we ended up here in the first place... but that's a different chapter.
Second thing about the holidays.... so she doesn't want to spend time with my family, huh? So please help me understand why she's paging through a catalog (am I the only person here who is being buried by catalogs in the US Mail?)... anyway, so she's going through a catalog picking Christmas gifts for her to give to my mother. Does she really think I would hand it to my mother and say, "This is from wife ... she had other plans." ?? Go figure. Alien.
Something is going to happen. Her confusion and guilt are driving her somewhere. Not sure where.
