Mixed signals - catfan's continual saga part???

[catfan]

Well we soldier on in our situation. Over the past week the transmission in her car has slowly gone bad. The estimates are in the thousands because it has to be replaced and can't be rebuilt. I've helped her along without expectations, just being nice and its reaped some benefits. Bottom line, the used car I bought her last year before we moved back the the US is going to get replaced. This whole situation is weighing on her especially the financial aspects of it. She's feeling the pressure and appreciated all my help this week and has expressed so several times.

Friday we met for lunch and I finally told her about me getting an apartment. But I did so with a twist, I brought up something I felt it was time to say. In a nutshell I said, there are a thousand reasons for us to work on us from emotional to practical. From a practical standpoint me spending money on an apartment while she starts to struggle financially isn't smart. We both have expressed a desire to work on our relationship so lets get serious about it.

This jolted her a bit and she knew I was right. She ended up telling me to not spend the money on an apartment right now and she thought I was right. Yet she isn't sure what we should do and wants to take it slow and still work on friendship. She still has reservations that my changes aren't permanent which I acknowledged and said, well keep watching. But she does like what she sees. I told her I thought it'd be a good idea is we first spend more time together rather than just talking every day. She was hesitant but I suspect will come around on that idea.

So her first act from this was to ask me to go with her that evening car shopping. We had a good time, well as good a time as can be had while car shopping, talked about cars and even us a bit. Joked about our differences me being a talker and her quiet and how we are both learning to understand the other better.

Admittedly this was rather pushy on my part but we've been playing on this plateau a bit too long and it's time once again to take a good step up.