I'm glad to see things are good and boring for you! But it sometimes feels like when you leave the amusement park. The calm and quiet is good, yet the roller-coaster is still slightly appealing. And I don't mean the bad parts, none of us want to live through the hell we've all been through but it's such an adrenaline rush that the calm after the storm is a bit of a let down. I know I'm not making any sense. It does in my head, I just am not able to get it out properly . Hopefully you know what I mean .
I did have a comment on a previous post.
Quote: So hard in my sitch (glad to know I'm not alone), where the woman is the one with the higher sex drive. It just seems so ironic! H could be with one of thousands of women for whom making love is at the bottom of the priority list, and I could be with the majority of men who find physical love to be a priority.
But no, we're with each other.
I totally feel for you. I have "Sex-Starved Marriage" as well and totally identify with the higher sex drive partner. I remember early in our M, we negotiated down to 2x/week and it never took. That was a good part of my resentment. We haven't discussed it again yet. After the kids were born, my sex drive went down a lot. It rebounded but then we were well on our way down the spiral. My H would be perfectly happy with once every week or two...and only on the weekend. I could walk out buck naked on a Tuesday and he would ask me to move out of the way of the tv!! I haven't read the second part of the book, but I'm starting it soon. Just wanted to let you know you're not the only one. Unfortunately, the two of us probably just gave everyone WAY too much info!! GOod thing this is a BB, not a meeting!
Ok, one last question and I will end this monstrous post. You posted to Sage and said you knew she was on. How? I've seen other people say that, too. Is it the timing of the posts? or is there a way to know who the "registered users" are?
Erin
"A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing."
-George Bernard Shaw
Glad things are going so well for you. Looking forward to seeing CJay here.
By the way the Eckhart Tolle book changed my view of things dramatically, thanks for the tip.I really related to the pain body and recognition of it, sorted quite a few things out in my head. Thanks mate.
Im glad your H wants to come to the BB to get advice. That is a huge step. Actually seeing him make an effort. Its something I am longing to see, but maybe in time.
I hold lots of resentment about sexual issues too. It actually bothers me a lot. I dont know how to get over it just yet, so I dont know that I can give you any advice on that issue.
Sounds like you have some exciting events planned for the near future. Good for you. Try to focus on those events and less on the day to day drama of your R. Im probably not the best one to give that advice. I have let myself slip into that catagory, but am going to start working hard at getting away from it. I can see how much it is affecting me. I dont want to see it affect you.
Welcome aboard CJay!
FLoyd The grass is always GREENER over the septic tank.
Glad you finding "the NOW" to be helpful . I know it entered my life at exactly the right time...it was part of my realization that whatever comes, I will be OKAY.
HI Floyd...nice to see you here!
Have you read Sex Starved Marriage? Was this an issue before for you guys? It's really quite enlightening.
CJay has posted on SBH's SAM's thread, hasn't set his own up just yet.
Well things continue to go nicely here. Just feels comfortable and hopeful at the same time. Kinda nice, really .
Shiny! I saw your CJay post- I like him already! Sounds like you are graciously handling the aging process of the week! Here's to 30something! I have yet asked what we are doing for my b-day- think i should? This is one of those things we dont do well- communicate! I may just wait and see as he hasnt asked and I pretty sure if he didnt have a plan he would. Too risky? Have a great day, maybe sometime I will be on when you are! How can you tell?