Picnic analogy

[mako]

I like the castle part of this story, and want to add to that.

Next time you (as a LBS) want to play the blame game, and curse the castle, remember the hand you played in building it. The WAS didn't just find a castle, she built it from scratch. But she couldn't do it herself. Most likely, the LBS was there every step of the way, bringing her the stones and raw materials of whatever she was unhappy about, which she eventually brought together into the giant castle where she now resides.

So step 1: stop bringing her stones! Whatever you did to aid in building these walls, just stop. She will never come out while she is still building and strengthening it. Begging, pleading, explaining, rationalizing, arguing, resenting...these are all stones that she will just use to make the castle stronger. The more you worry about what she's doing and trying to change her mind, the more you are just bringing her stones.

Once you stop all this, perhaps she will have nothing left to build with. And only when the castle is complete will she take the time to actually look outside and see what's going on at the picnic.