What a good year this has been.....

[forever21]

It's still a tough situation for me right now. Though I know better, I'm finding it very difficult not to sympathize too much with my H. I think I'm staying strong enough though. Trying, definitely.

Thank you Julie, Kim07, and Kman!!!!!!! I can't tell you how much your support has helped me out.

Last night I listened to a voicemail H left for me in the evening (still haven't listened to the previous ones) and he was crying. It made me feel so bad. He has been so pushy. When I was listening to him on that VM though it was hard not to feel sorry for him. He says he just wants a house to live in, that it's only fair, he works hard, wants both of us to walk away from this having something, etc. I get that and would like the same. I think he means well deep down, I just don't think he's being realistic. He's also very likely being pressured by OW.

Some of what he's saying makes sense. I'd love to be able to make a deal with him that is good for both of us so we can move on with the least amount of damage, and not waste money having the lawyers battle it out. The big fat red light, as Kman put it, is that there's such a big rush. I'm thinking.... if it's looking too good to be true, walk away. Not that easy when I know it's a good idea to jump at the opportunity when the WAS is motivated and being generous, and since I'm in a place where I'm ready and fine with moving on myself. It's a red flag to me that H is saying exactly that though... that I should not pass up this deal, etc. I just don't know if there's any agreements we can put in place that will remove enough of the risk for me. I need to talk more with the L.

Yesterday I was still open to "just talk" to H with the help of a mediator and H called to set that up, but when the mediator called and spoke with me he thought I wasn't ready. I think the guy was doing what was right, but it was frustrating because it made it look like I backed out.

It turns out the deadline H gave me of the end of this week wasn't honest... go figure. He apparently has till the 24th and is going to try to get that moved till the end of this month. I told him I understand what he is offering right now but I need to talk to a lawyer who represents me before I can start negotiating with him. I called the L's office again this morning because his assistant hadn't gotten back to me yesterday, and their office is closed today.