She doesn't know if she wants a divorce

[mkultra]

Dating others has been a way to bust divorce..It may be like you said jealousy, possessiveness or maybe the spouse needs to see their mate as someone they could lose before theyare ready to recommit. I think you should go to counseling. You were absolutely right to be honest to your friend about being with your wife but if you really want to save your marriage, and you do not sound so sure. You may not be able to expect your W to do the same thing. If you have three kids and 9 years together you owe it to youir family to do everything in your power to reconnect with the mother of your children. But of course I am biased because I am on a Divorce Busting Forum!!! Sometimes spouses will not give up someone waiting in the wings but if you build some trust with your wife, she can trust you and love you and begin anew. Good luck and keep the faith.