NikkiB #22 (almost separated)

[NikB]

Thanks again all! I got really caught up in one Newcomer's sitch so sorry I haven't been updating much. It's sad how there are sooo many new stories every day - and funny how one will just grab you and make you want to help. I often just read and get overwhelmed, but this one person's story really touched me. I hope I can help. It makes me really see how that may have happened with some of you - my "newcomer" posts caught your attention - and it makes me want to say THANK YOU!!!! all the more. So - THANK YOU!!!

First replies...

OT
Oh yes.. will definitely be taking more photos at future meetups. I have some from the pumpkin carving with cute-guy's hand on my back (he played it off as "posing" but all the ladies later were going "OMG that was sooo obvious he was trying to touch you" - it was funny). Not sure if H saw those.. don't think so.. but I may leave my photos on the cards a bit longer than normal.

morgan
Thanks!! I know, isn't that soap dish the cutest thing?? I can't even imagine messing it up with soap.. . Looks like a perfect ring/earring/necklace holder though.

ST
Thanks!! I totally agree on the mirror and especially that horrendous tile. The mirror is unfortunately a medicine cabinet and I REALLY need the storage space. I'm not sure I'm ready to tackle sawing drywall and reframing and all that to mount a new medicine cabinet in there.. will think about it but I'm guessing that it's a pretty complex job. I'll check out the pics you sent, though! Maybe adding mirrors to the sides could work somehow - THAT I could tackle.

The tiles would probably be easier to replace than sand down and such, but like you said, just really not worth the effort and cost.

LOVE the rug idea, thanks!! I didn't even think to put a nice dark rug in there - I think that'd look really good.

My friend/coworker is having a party on Fri night and invited me - I told her about my paint dilemna and she said I should bring my pillow as her office is a color she thinks I'd love! (AND she still has the paint chip so knows the color). So I'll do that - it's apparently a muted beige-y green, which sounds perfect. If that doesn't work, yep, I think just the neutral beige!

Dave
Ha... yeah, no kidding. I know he's got a headache. Yeah, just those of us here alone could pretty much sustain the whole psych industry I think.

jak
Thank you, Ms. Power Tools! Oh don't worry.. not getting sucked back in. Enjoying the positives, but seeing them for what they are. haha congrats on the toilet, didn't that feel great fixing it yourself??

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So an update... Monday I forget why I was even sidetracked.. but Tuesday I got a lot of GREAT news at work. A really good bonus, a raise, and a promotion - ALL unexpected!! Gotta love days like that, eh??

The best part about it is I am finally in charge of something important at work again - makes it so much easier to focus on it and really put myself into it. For the longest time I was doing either "busy-work" or projects I knew were likely to be dropped.. tough to get inspired.

The bonus means I can pay off my room stuff and have a NICE cushion for GAL'ing activities next year... and the raise pays for getting my teeth fixed. YAY!!! I am really excited.

Tuesday night was Bellydancing. Only 2 of us showed up so we had a practically private lesson. Was kinda fun but I'm still new to it so I think I prefer the "anonymity" of a group! I did ok though and felt great after. It's funny how good that makes me feel - I have talked myself out of it a few times when I felt kind of "off" but when I make myself go it's ALWAYS a boost.

H had Monday and Tuesday off - and did a TON of work around the house. Yard care, house care.. just stuff he hasn't been doing lately. Oddly he even fixed the tile in "my" new bathroom - said now the room looked nice and he wanted the tile to also. At first I felt kind of funny about this but I haven't actually talked to him about it being MY room yet, so it isn't really fair for me to get upset about this.. it's not like he intruded on "my" space. It made me realize we need to have that talk soon though.

Tuesday when I got home I was very excited and shared my raise/bonus info with H... he immediately wanted to go out to dinner and celebrate, was very excited for me. We went out, had a good time. He had a knot in his back too - he used to get these sometimes and they'd take WEEKS to go away. Through trial and error I figured out the way to massage them out... which I did when he asked last night, and he's been thanking me nonstop ever since.

I can count on one hand the number of times he's called me at work in the last 3 months - but today, when he called me 3 times! A couple of times with questions and one time I have no idea why he even called, just to say hi it seemed like. Wow. And all week - no texts. In fact H leaves his phone in the car for the most part. Wants to ask about my day, share his day with me. It's all very positive on the R/M front.

Funny, a lady I work with said "It almost seems to me like he's trying to pretend everything's back to normal without actually talking about it or confronting the issues." I think she's soo right.

Don't worry - I am not going to roll over. If anything all this has helped my resolve to go forward with this in house sep thing.

I have lots of fun weekends plans so I'm excited for that. Kinda nervous about Thanksgiving but even there I have a really fun Fri - Sun planned... so not too worried. Gotta get to bed so I'll post more later, but wanted to at least post an update. Thanks again all!!!