I am sorry to hear everything that has happened to you but am extremely happy for you that it all worked out and you have a good marriage now. I think DB'ing is about doing what works for you personally and the letter did for you.
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My H said that he had never thought threw how it would work and did know deep down she wasn't for him. He knew, he now says, as soon as he had my letter telling him how much I loved him he wanted to be with me but didn't know how to get rid of OW and the mess he had created.
I would love the opportunity to hear these words.
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I have come to accept that it is OK to dislike OW and that I always will but that she was a symptom of our problems NOT the cause.
I hate the OM too but have not shouted or screamed at him or harmed him even when my wife baited me to. I do not understand my reaction to losing my wife and children and it haunts me to think that I did not fight for her when I had the chance. I feel like I was a wimp and that was one of the reasons she left.
I have suffered from depression, low self esteem, lack of confidence, motivation, etc. However, since DB'ing, my confidence and self esteem are getting much better. My motivation is improving and I am trying to keep positive.
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Her OM does not sound like good long term material.
