Yo LL. Okay, big response because I've read through this week's threads...
Quote: LL should add that at 5'8" those weights are not bad.
Okay, this is kind of funny. When I pictured LL before I read this, I saw a 5'2" very petite, long, brown-haired sassy woman. I think I got the sass right?!?!
Quote: will I ever trust h??
will I ever trust that it's for real???
how can I get there???
I ask for what I want... I get it... and it leads to more susspision.
is there something wrong with me??
So, the last couple of weeks have been pretty good between me and my W. She's really trying. But today I couldn't get ahold of her on the telephone--either she's at home or I can reach her via the cell. I get paranoid because she'd turn her cell off when she was with OM. Well, I talked to her later and come to find out that she didn't have her cell...the battery was dead. My long-winded point? I don't really know the answer because I'm having to deal with the exact same thing... However, I will say that because I've been so busy with work (also had a job interview) that I've had little time to think about the A. It's kind of been a relief.
I do think, LL, that when our Ses are home and truly give something of themselves to our Rs, that they are not having an A. Remember the distance your H had when he was having his A ("last year before h left..after ow disclosure and h was "trying" things were not as they are now...h was not doing and saying the same things he is now...")? The distance is less now, no? I think that barrier is simply them watering the other side of the fence, so to speak (you know what I mean). As they slowly focus less on the OP, they focus more on us and their R with us. Did that make any sense?
I guess what I'm saying is that it's hard for our Ses to give themselves to us when they're busy giving "it" to someone else...and when they are present with us...they really are present.
Quote: feeling distance again? not liking it??
in-laws came over for dinner...h arrived after them...fil at upon arival and then off to the basement for a nap...
Heck, LL, sometimes I want to go down to a basement for a nap when my mother shows up. Know what I'm saying?
Quote: I don't want to make the same mistakes my parents made...
LL, you know far more about the dynamics of an R than I'm sure your parents still do. You have an understanding that they don't... I can't imagine you making the same mistake. Give it some time...
Quote: h said he cancelled the service and that he could have just told me so but thought I'd like to see the phone fly??
However, I will say that because I've been so busy with work (also had a job interview) that I've had little time to think about the A. It's kind of been a relief.
