Quoting lostlove: to be honest I am getting a bit fearfull...it was last easter that h up and said..."i can't do this anymore" and 3 days later left...I don't see us heading in that direction again but I know I will be a bit restless about it in the comming weeks.
I can relate as I went through something similar last month. The best advise I can give is hang in there, LL ... ride it out ... and you will arrive on the other side alright.
This week, I've been watching "Children of Dune" on SciFi. I had read the novels during my teenage summers (Can you say "NERD"). Repeated through out the story is a mantra that applies to DBing as well:
Fear is the mind-killer... I will face my fear ... I will let it pass through me ...
In essence, accept that these thought will happen and it is OK that they do, but when they do occur, acknowledge that you need to let them go. Forcefully dismiss them from your mind if need be rather than hold onto them. If you continue to ponder these thoughts, they start to consume you. If you take action based on these thoughts, they can lead to the destruction of the empire. (A little over the top, I know, but point made I hope) .
How you go about finding a way for these fears to pass through you is different for each person. You will need to find what works for LL, but the answer can't require something from H. It must come from within.
Until you can find the answer, as Bridget has aleady said, when the thoughts occur, DO NOTHING in terms of R, ... ride it out ... don't act upon those thoughts until the mind clears ... One means now in how to interpret allowing the fear to pass through you.
If your into SciFi, this is a classic trilogy and the TV channel has done it just in converting it into a mini-series.
Repeated through out the story is a mantra that applies to DBing as well:
