Thanks for your thoughtful and heartfelt post, and your encouragement. Last nite was a tough night for me, for some reason, as I cried my eyes out several times for the first time in months. I think I'm beginning to mourn the end of my marriage.
I also felt overwhelmed with grief and disappointment over squandering the gifts that God has given me in my life, and -- even though I felt His love and forgiveness, as I always do -- I also had this sense of how sad and disappointed He must be in us.
We have totally pulled away from each other now, I think in preparation for the end. Our meeting with the family law court judge happens on January 9th, and at that point we'll have to decide if we're continuing with the divorce action, asking for another stay, or withdrawing the action. Withdrawing it is not even a realistic possibility anymore, and another stay would only delay me getting on with the rest of my life.
