Anger is what I read. If you were not angry then you would have picked up the phone yourself and worked the schedule directly with xW. Putting a five year old in this situation was not good and is counter to ALL co-parenting guidelines you will find.
Then the second night you wrote that you "told" the kids they had the next day off - of course they jumped at the chance to stay with you - as you implied for them to do (may have been subconscious but it was implied). They do not know what is really happening. You do.
Then you lambast your xW for being angry. She had every right to be angry. She was the one you placed in the position of saying no to her daughter or giving up her time with her. But xW let it slide - she could document what I am writing now and hire a lawyer to make things "right".
The visitation schedule should have been worked out ahead of time. If you don't have in writting what 50/50 means then do it now. Playing it day to day is not fair to anyone, especially the kids. They NEED a schedule.
Your past work schedules mean nothing and does not entitle you to additional time with them now, unless that was in a signed agreement. If you should end up in court, she could use any effort on your part to keep the kids extra time against you. She can accuse you of "using" your daughter against her.
In court, 50/50 is not a given.
Build a schedule, build a parenting plan, get it in writing.
So 50/50 IS what it means? How angry is that? Whatever schedule you come up will never be in concrete unless you are totally unflexible. There will be many times in the children's lives where deviation from the schedule will be in their best interests.
At best, you will average 50/50. At the very best, you may get less than 50% but enjoy that fact b/c you did right by your kids.
At worst, you will keep score and land in the never ending custody battle with her.
