I guess this is a negative post but kids are involved.
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it gave me a chance to spend more time with my D5 and S4. They wanted to stay Saturday night so I helped my D to call my W to see if it was ok with her.
One of the top five rules about separation and divorce is that kids are not used as messengers between parents. Especially kids as young as yours. If you wanted more time with the kids, it was your responsibility to communicate directly with former W. What the kids "want" had little to do with it, this was about you and it is a co-parenting issue.
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On Sunday, my D asked if they could stay another night since I told her she didn't have school on Monday. WELL...I did the same thing and had my D call my W.
If my former W did this to me, I would have been more than just angry. Putting your D on the phone AGAIN made your W the bad parent if she said no. Putting your D on the phone was asking D to tell her mom that she would rather be with dad than with mom.
Mark, you need to develop a co-parenting plan with your former W. That plan should have a detailed schedule for the kids. If the kids or the situation changes then it is up to the parents, without the children present or even knowing about it, to work out a change. If one parent says "no" then the other parent supports that. The message is not "mom says no", the message is "tomorrow is your time to be with mom, she misses you, and I am sure you miss her too".
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I am sick and tired of being looked down upon as some low-life. She better be prepared because 50/50 custody is exactly what it means. She had a problem with just 2 days(not even 2 full days) and wait until she only sees them 1/2 the week.
The two days were HER days, not yours. Again, if my former W did this to me ...
"She had better be prepared...". Bury the anger Mark, it is spilling onto your kids. Your kids love BOTH parents. And they need a father who will support their mom and keep them out of the middle of adult discussions, such as visitation schedules. Parents must work together for the good of the kids - 50/50 is NOT "exactly what it means".
