Lil Geez, you people. What I liked was his enthusiasm and willingness, something I NEVER see in my life.
Yes the guy's enthusiasm was great but what I saw through my own filter was I do many of those same things and sex still is bad.
No I don't do all the things the guy did, but I thought I did more than enough to get things going in the right direction.
something I NEVER see in my life. Well, not in your current R. It sounds like your H was willing to do some of these things. One of your former partners was enthusiastic about several of the things. BB was enthusiastic at one time for several years.
That is commonly the problem, we experienced enthusiasm at one time, at least when it came to some elements of the guy's example.
I suppose if I saw things more optimistically, like you did, I could see the situation from a point of abundance.
Not being in environment of abundance, but scarcity did influence me to see the guy as doing all of the work and not getting much in return. Like I said before, that was my filter.
Speaking of abundance, well BB and I were there at one time even when things around us were not abundant.
I can say I have been around abundant people, but rarely in a generally abundant environment.
It was a lesson for me to take your POV, how nice it would be to be served. I still have a BIG problem when someone tries to serve me. I even volunteer to do other people’s taxes. Yes, that is a new church related service program I joined. “Link & Learn, Coming Together to Strengthen Communities”
So far so good.
Don’t wheel yourself too far away. I bet others will see it from your POV (abundance) too, instead of something that we doubt we will ever achieve.
I actually took the description to be a description of pretty much what most women do all the time (or at least dating/early M) cast in male terms. Indeed, I thought that was the point of the illustration -- to demonstrate how male-sexual-satisfaction centered most sex is by role reversal, and how much women do to in terms of romance and attentiveness to male sexual needs.
How abou that, lol.
If it is a genuine description, then I agree with others, it is unbalanced and doesn't sound like too great a sex life for the guy. But it still works to show why women who start out playing that role while dating/early marriage tire of it.
At least the guy gets to O with his partner rather than in private later, lol, as is the case with many women dating/early M.
Good points, oltimer. I saw the guy as being very generous. As a lover, I tend to be generous, but only one of my partners (y'all know who) reciprocated at the same level.
It didn't strike me that he was doing all the work and not getting much back. It struck me that he was giving without focusing on when it was going to be his turn.
I can't see why so many of you saw him as being too giving, over the top, controlling.
Lou wrote
Quote:
scarcity did influence me to see the guy as doing all of the work and not getting much in return.
If that scenario had been written about a woman doing "all the work" I probably would have had the same reaction as Lou, because I identify with a female partner who does all the work and gets little back.
However, since the scenario involved a guy doing the work and the woman being pleasured, I was thinking how nice it would be to have a really generous lover again.
I agree it would be great to have such a generous lover (and I have to admit that I do!), the important thing is the balance. Such a generous lover should have a generous lover in return, and that was what seemed to be missing I think. Just more give and take, more variety too, lol. Like some said, sometimes that scenario would be great, but not all the time.
I guess I'm confused by this. I mean... just because his wife has an O before he does during intercourse, why does that mean he has to stop, and finish by hand? And why isn't SHE finishing him by hand, or by mouth?
Part of my prob as an LDW had nothing to do with sexual technique or my ability (or his ability) to O. Sex wasn't the actual problem, though that is what was getting blamed... for everything!!
And even though the guy does sound generous, this sitch just doesn't sound healthy to me... if THEY are both happy, tho, then that's all that really matters.
