Well I kind of lost it a little today. H called me regarding d12's report card. She did terribly. He started out by asking what we can do. How do we punish her. Show her consequences....

I then lost it (a little). I told him that if he wanted to get her into a psychologist or tutoring...fine, but right now punishment is not going to work with her. She is broken right now. Both kids are broken. They are just dealing with it differently.

H then got all defensive. Saying that we can work together to fix them. I finally told him something that his sister said to him: S15 won't come back to him right now. He is not a role model for him and s15 can't handle H's behavior. It is the truth. Probably bad dbing but let's call a spade a spade.

D12....well she is just about to be a teenager and instead of being angry at H she knows his achilles is school....so she just isn't trying. I did call he guidance counselor to speak with her. We talked about some testing and some counseling.....

So he then starts to lay the...oh so now you are blaming me thing on him. Well I told him that until he fixes himself none of his R will work..especially with s15. That our kids are broken right now and he has no idea what this is doing to them. Of course he tries to tell me lots of people go through this and turn out fine....yeah fine with lots of baggage.

Anyway he called back a little later to apologize. H suggested we go to C together to try a different path. What different path. He just wants someone to try fix things so that everyone accepts his decision and is happy about it. So the kids are all well in good with him messing around with a married woman and living the life of a teenager. He has been hanging around since the summer.....and nothing worked. S15 won't come around until H can be the man he can respect and look up to that he once was.

His actions have not only affected our children's r with him but with their R with his family. I told him that s15 wants nothing more than to spend thanksgiving with H's family.

I told h that I would drop the kids off wherever his family was going to be for thanksgiving....and H replied that he has been trying to figure out thanksgiving and how we can all spend it together. He said he wanted to come cook for us but knew s15 wouldn't sit down to eat. Thanksgiving....altogether...wtf.

So who knows where his head is. H still with/back to MOW and still wants his family for thanksgiving. He is so messed up and I feel like I totally blew all of my DBing....but for him not to see how all of this is hurting our children and thinking that there is some sort of favorable way for this to end while he is out in lala land...he must be nuts.

On another front, he never went with his sister to the dr. Blew her off. He blames me because now she isn't speaking to him. UGH..why did i ever bother. Why did I think he would actually hurt himself when he is living large. No responsibilities, a wife who still wants him, a gf who wants him....bleh!

Thanks for letting me vent.

Mopsey

So,

I think I left him lots to think about...none of it good.