I just posted the below on my other thread, but thought it may belong here more. ----------------- | -----------
Here is something that has kind of surprised me. Now that my W "loves" me,and tells me she wants to be with me,I'm a little confused.
This morning, I'm imagining what it would be like to have the W in the house, to have her back, and I'm thinking "I'm more comfortable now without her. This is nice. Why do I want her here? Will it be like it was - which wasn't that great? Why do any two people want to be together? We've had kids, so we've procreated. What other purpose is there?"
Our MC talked a little about true intimacy, and how we can work toward that. Not really understanding what that means, it's hard for me to say I want it. Did my W and I have it at one time, and lose it? See my other post this morning about choice. Can I chose intimacy if I don't know what it is or if it's even possible?
This is my philosophical side. I've learned to trust my instincts more. My instincts say to enjoy the ride and let it grow naturally, not try to control it. That's what I'll do. But, the doubt is there. What if M is just a comfortable couple living together, who may occasionally ML? Is that all there is? If not, what is the alternative like? Can someone describe it?
M45, W45,S15, D10, Bomb 10/3/06, Moved back in 11/6/06, finally ILY 9/07 last thread
