And so it begins...

[Dom R]

good morning,

You recommend me to "Not be impulsive any more." I don't know how to do that.

I'd say it's all about not making decisions, without thinking of the long-term consequences. Similarly, dont make decisions solely thinking of short term "avoid the pain" issues. That second one is something your wife specifically accused you of, isnt it?

moving out, is an "avoid the pain" impulsive move.
It "hurts" [ie; VERY DIFFICULT] to stick in your house, and not argue, and be a better man.
Similarly, it would "hurt" to be confronted by your wife's anger/unhappiness/disappointment with you face to face.
So you ran away.

dont "avoid the pain" any longer.

'cause "long term consequences" of being separated == pain and hurt for your family, most specifically your daughter.

Do I need to get into a treatment program or a counselor? ...I suppose it would be a bad idea to ask my wife for support and/or assistance in trying to deal with both the addiction and other mental issues? She's always been my best friend, the person I can count on to help me through the rough times, and now I don't know who to look to for support.

A lot of women I think, would take their husband getting into counselling, as a huge, positive step. In some ways, you getting into counselling, rather than asking your wife to dig you out of your hole, would be the best thing to do.
Plus, she's been probably trying to help you for years. unsuccessfully. So she would probably be both too frustrated and also may not have the best methods.

Where to go for counselling, depends greatly on whether you are a strongly believing Christian or not. If you are really Christian, you will do best with a good Christian counsellor. Otherwise, it varies.

You MIGHT try the approach, of moving back home, apologising for your behaviour, and announcing that you are looking for personal counselling, on top of AA.
Show your wife that you fully intend to find one yourself, so she doesnt HAVE to help... but if she has any recommendations, you would be very interested to know of them.

I think that this could be beneficial, because it both shows that you are determined to work on the problem, AND you value her input as to how to solve it.

Plus, you might reflect on more things she has told you over the years, about your issues, and things she may have asked you to improve in yourself.