Your 11 yr old is more mature than W or OM. I would believe him.
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I do not for one minute suspect this man for being an abuser but I sure do not like the way my son is being treated and I know that my son is not an habitual liar, there must be some truth to it.
Well, the things you described seem horribly unfair to me, borderlining on abuse. Especially from a man who has no business disciplining this 11 yr old child. He is no one to your son. That upsets me.
Legal advice, legal advice, legal advice.
And document everything.
It must be horrible to not be able to be with your kids and be worrying about them. HUGS!