What a good year this has been.....

[forever21]

Great to hear from you here, Bethie!!!! I did read your post to me over in Surviving too, that was nice.

The power was out here for several hours today, but it's back on now. It's nice and toasty because I have a fire going in the wood stove, which I don't normally do. The storm had died but a few minutes ago it looked like it might not be done. Hope it is. Gonna do popcorn and a movie tonight. Haven't done that in a long time.

Why do you think that your posts sound depressing? I think they sound pretty introspective. Isn't that a good thing? You've been living in Limbo for so long, waiting on Husband to wake up, but now you're actually starting to look around and maybe even think of yourself for a change. That's all good sweetie!

Thank you for that. You're right. I just knew I wasn't having much of a PMA, but I also don't think it's such a bad thing. No need to always make myself feel good/happy in a lame situation. I think that has contributed to me not getting myself out of this spot. Feeling depressive and negative isn't good though, but I'm doing better now.

You know, I understand that we all had dreams that were either missed opportunities, or we ourselves tossed them aside for another choice. It's never to late to recapture what we've lost or put on hold. That's one of the best things about being in this position. Your life certainly is far from over and the onething I feel in your sitch is that your husband really needs to have a fire lit under him or he will never have to choose.

True. You're right, again. Getting to sort of start over is most definitely one of the best things about being in this position. I know my life is far from over. As far as my H/M goes though, I am not feeling the hope. I'm still really interested in hearing your thoughts on lighting a fire under my him. You have any idea how that might happen?

I guess I think it's most likely I will be cutting all ties with him if I don't sign that quit claim.... based on everything he said and just how I'm feeling about it all. Yeah, I know... don't believe anything they say. Regardless, I say "too bad", because I'm not scared to act in my own best interest and he cannot expect me to trust his word.

I no longer see myself being happy with him anyway. I think I just got fed up with him. Finally had enough. He isn't attractive to me anymore. We probably should've just divorced when he had his first affair. At this point, I guess I'm not seeing the good in him. There is good in everyone, we all know, but the bad in him is keeping me from wanting to go there again. I think it's self-preservation at this point. I don't trust him at all.

I also found the quit claim dicussion very fishy. In a case like that it should be either or, not onething hinging on the other, but Kev's response was really the right one so I won't confuse the issue anymore.

Feels good to know you're skeptical too. As much as I wanted to dig deeper to find out exactly why I needed to sign that (like Kev suggested), I know I can't trust my H to tell me the truth. I've also been following my C's advice to just talk to an attorney to get the info I need, so I've refrained from trying to gather information from H and his sources. In the meantime, it's a little tempting to talk to H's "financial lady" to hear her explanation even though part of me doesn't want to talk to any of "his people". H would be happy for me to. Do you think I should? It's so hard to see this clearly from where I sit.

Thank you, Beth, my vacation was wonderful. It was exactly what I needed.
And... yeah, I guess I am starting to see again that I was the best thing that ever happened to my H. Thanks for that too!

(((((Bethie)))))

Hope all is well for you and yours.