CVA, as you know I have been there, and still am, it seems like we maybe are pulling our kids away from their mom's, but in reality aren't they the one who initiated the D, and decided to break up the family, in the first place?
In mine and the kids discussion the other day, DD11 said I hate mom, and I had to tell her, not to hate mom, and that I am no saint. I don't want them to hate her, I just want them to love us both. They can and will make up their own minds on who's right and who's wrong, but they should have a say in where they spend their holidays. My kids have told me that they don't want to spend the holiday with mom, because of the OM, they said they would be much more happier with me.
Letting the kids speak their minds, shows that you care about what they want. But the truth is, the final decision is yours and your W's to open to listening to them. They know what makes them happy. After all, isn't that what you both want for them? Take care.
