Markb, I can't imagine how horrible this must be for you. But, I think the more you focus on how things use to be and how they are right now, the worse you are going to feel. You must think ahead. Set goals for yourself and your kids that don't include your W. She is in the past. I know you aren't ready to accept that, but you have to start thinking that way in order to coop. It is going to destroy you if you don't get your eyes off that and onto something positive. I realize that is easy for me to say and hard for you to do. I know that. But sweetie, do it for your kids, if not for yourself. They need you so much and it doesn't sound like she is 100% there for them right now. I'm sure they have seen the pain between the two of you enough to enforce a lot of insecurity in them, so they need to know that they are very important to you and that you aren't going to leave them. They should help keep you busy if you have them 50% of the time. The other 50% should be spent on getting a life! I know you don't want to nor will you feel like it.....but you will have to make yourself. OK?
Take care and know that we are concerned for you. Post anytime you can.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
