- When I talked about it she became passive aggressive (clamed up).
- I had to come up with all the attempted solutions. Her deal was 'To NOT make such a big deal over this!'. I guess to her it was not a big deal.
- Mine had abuse too. I don;t think it was sexual but abusive.
You have to make her view this as serious. I know that is easier said than done. For me, I felt guilt that I focused on this issue. The No. More Mr. Nice Guy book talks about this.
I sum up my stitch like this:
"It was too painful to stay emotionally engaged with her. Withdrawing was the only way to protect myself."
And This:
"I will not remain in a marriage/relationship where my partner is not interested in meeting my ENs!"
It took me 16 months to get there! After reading a lot of other forums (Mis-matched Libidos, this one), some people have been stuck for 10+ years in this living hell!
I have a good friend who is 65 and he married the same women twice! The intimacy was a constant battle with these two.
He finally is in the process of the divorce and has counseled me MANY times on this situation.
