donna, what an amazing post. I feel so similarly in that I really want to hold on to my good memories. H has tried to twist and change them, I'm done hearing his re-creation of things. I want to remember the good...I don't want him to ever take that away from me. he can have the memories he chooses.
nnp, I can't even imagine someone treating me the way H has treated me, the way he has talked to me. it floors me, shocks me, makes me think he is crazy, because what sane person acts this way? I don't know when it became okay for him to treat me the way he does. and really, its only okay in his mind, I need to not let it be okay. one of the biggest things my therapist has shown me is not only how to stay in a confrontation, but also how its okay to walk away. I used to run from any kind of confrontation, then when I learned to stand my ground, I didn't understand there are times when it is acceptable, even healthy, to leave. I think I've finally figured that out. its one thing to have a tough dialog, its a whole 'nother ballgame to stay and be verbally abused.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
