There and Back #12

[SallyM]

sometime donna I may just have to do that, thanks for the invite!

I ended up watching a bit of arrested development, then finally decided to head downstairs. it was good...I tackled the christmas totes. we have a ton of christmas stuff, but it didn't end up being too bad. I put some music on, and went thru each one. I bawled my eyes out for a while...sceamed, cried, gnashed teeth, yelled, all of it. no setting timers...I asked my friend if I should and she told me not to, to just get it all out. didn't end up being all that long, actually, and wow did it feel good.

I separated out the stuff that is his and his alone...the hallmark ornaments from his childhood, the misc. ornaments I have given him over the years. the ones that we bought together that are more us, though, I kept. I'm sorry, they are NOT going on ow's tree. if he wants any of the other misc. decor, well, we'll see. I am not comfortable with stuff we bought together, or was given as gifts to us together, being in his home that he shares with an OW. hoenstly I doubt it will be an issue, I doubt if he will want it. but I know the ornaments that are particularly sentimental for him and set those aside. I packed up a box of "his" stuff and set it inside the basement closet with the box of his sweaters, his cds, etc. If he wants to take it, he's welcome to it. I just know those are not going on my tree this year.

I felt good. and boy how happy am I that I bought all those totes from target last year! made this very easy.

I'm going to be okay. I look like sh!t. haven't been doing a very good job at taking care of myself. I haven't seen my normal 5x per week w/o in a while, and I can feel it. don't get me wrong, I haven't completely slacked, but haven't been as vigilant, and it is not good. after the basement I came upstairs and worked out my schedule for the week...getting back into the routine. no more backsliding on taking care of me. including eating better. I haven't been eating regular meals. outside of a bowl of oatmeal in the morning, I don't think I've sat down for a real meal in a while. need to get back to eating with the kids. don't get me wrong, I've been eating, btw, just grabbing stuff here and there. I feel lousy for it. just have not been treating myself well at all.

anyway, that's my update for the night. hope everyone is doing well.

goals for tomorrow include lots of play time/special time with the kids, but also w/o and ab tape. I was going to skip those (well, the gym anyway) since the weather looked lousy, but I just checked again and now they are saying it might clear up early, and who knows, may end up being nothing at all, so going to go with it. if it is lousy, well, going to throw tae bo in.