cemar, I wasn't looking at it from the perspective of "not complete". For me, it was just not something I was into. Even now, I have to really let myself go and give it a chance before I can really enjoy it. It just got to the point for me where I knew I didn't really enjoy it, and I had better things to do like clean the house or go shopping. It's not like it was going to be 20 minutes of pure pleasure, like it would for my H.
That said, I NOW know that my attitude was terrible and I have changed it. And I NOW agree that it is a very important part of M. It does bring us closer together. It's just that for my H, it is guaranteed that he'll get something out of it. It is not guaranteed for me. And liek I said above, I have to make a conscious choice to try to get into it, and these days it usually works.
Last night, for example, H had asked if I was making cookies for dessert. I told him that I was the dessert. So that started it. H was in a good mood all night waiting for dessert. So, when it came time, I wasn't in the mood. But I knew I couldn't back down, so I just went with it and pretended I was into it. And eventually I was.
Does that make any sense?
RJ, Hang in there. It's all a journey and we are all learning every day.
Married 9 years Kids 5 and 6 Bomb 2006 H back and forth for a year M now back on track
