I think it's different levels of "love". One deeper, one simply an infatuation. The rush feelings, is all. They can mask the more "settled" version of love that you get with marriage.
Everyone is susceptible. We are practically hard-wired to have affairs.
I certainly have felt that pull. Twice, strongly.
I had what was probably an EA shortly before xh took up with xow. In retrospect, it was a friendship I should have never cultivated. I simply didn't know. (Although I learned!)
The other time was just a year or so ago. (And I most certainly did know better!) Two jobs back. I had the worst crush on my boss. He was older...attractive...smart... I knew, if I wasn't careful, it would run away with me. We clicked pretty well. He had a girlfriend; obviously, I was married. I should have told xh sooner, but, instinctively, I hid it. When I left that position, although I spoke with other coworkers from there, I immediately cut off all contact with him. I knew it was the only way. I saw him again a couple of months ago...yikes, I'm still terribly attracted.
Anyway. Guess my point is...it's easier than we all would like to admit. You just have to learn to make the choice, constantly, to work on your current R.
