Still trying - Not very well

[limbo]

You know Cat you might be right! And in the process I will destroy marriage, I am going to make an appt with someone.

I have taken responsibility for how my marriage broke down, and maybe this is how I could get beyond the PA he had, I don't even think about that now...and since then I believe I have worked on changing how I was, and I was doing really well, and still am, but now seem to struggle with my own demons.
However when my H had is EA with his old flame, we had gone to retro, we were supposedly back on track, he had told me how he couldn't live with out me, loved me, was feeling happy with how things were.
Then turns around and tells EA that they are soul mates and wishes her child was his! It had hurt me, I am mourning, I mourn for my children...how could he throw them aside so easily negate there importance for something he imagines, how would they feel if they found out he had said this...so yes I mourn, and yes maybe this time it is going to take more time to forgive.

I am not mad at you Cat, just at him..I just want to yell and scream at him, but I wount, I will keep my mouth shut again, so that he can feel better.