CVA - Figuring out What's Next

[waw1978]

CVA

Sounds like you are going about this the best way possible. I think the email is a step in the right direction. Hopefully your W will realize that you two can sit down talk like adults without attys first and try to figure things out. This would be in both your best interests both financially and for your children. As you said in previous posts throwing money away on attys will just hurt everyone involved in the long run.

The fact is, the kids come first. Their best interests need to be considered. D11 & D9 are old enough to know exactly what is going on and will remember how both of you acted during this whole process.

PS: Great idea about discussing withdrawals from your bank accts etc. Probably makes her feel more secure to see you are not cleaning out the accounts or doing anything underhanded. Hopefully she will take your lead and do the same.

(((CVA)))

None of us here wants a D but being amicable doesn't always further the rift. In some cases it really lets the other spouse see us for the people we are or have become. Continue being new CVA, not controlling or angry. Accept this for what it is. You said she is being more polite. Maybe she feels relieved and this may open doors to communication esp once she sees that you are not going to revert to your old ways since she pulled the rug out from under you.

Keep true to the new you. Remember from the Semisonic song:

Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end

I know, not Rob Thomas...