There and Back #12

[SallyM]

see, and one nip starts a spiral. okay, not much of one, actually more like a bitch fest, but stop! doesn't seem to be working. its just not fair (whine whine whine) h gets to do all the fun stuff. he's going to vegas. he's staying at the freaking winn. he gets to go out to dinner all the time, is going to springsteen in a couple of weeks, gets to have sex whenever he wants.

I, on the other hand, get to haul the garbage, arrange for all the work on and around the house, or do what I can myself. I get to wipe snotty noses and change diapers (ahem, pullups, same diff, stubborn 3 year old son who won't train). I get to referee fights and listen to squabbles as they try to referee their own on occasion. I feel like I live at the grocery store and target. I get to scrub and clean and make appts and make sure everything is getting done. and he, well, he gets to play. yeah, and work, I know, I do appreciate what he does on that front, I do. but he still gets to play. and he is appreciated for what he does...appreciated by his coworkers/boss, appreciated by me for the work stuff at least, appreciated by ow for whatever else. me, well, I do all that I do and H doesn't see it, thinks I do nothing at all. and the kids, well, are kids. they think it all just happens magically. and dammit, I'm sick of sleeping alone. I know I complain a lot about this, but I'm freaking 40, folks, I'm not dead. how dare he make me celibate. he gets to have sex, I get freaking flannel sheets and a bunch of c batteries. not the same, boys and girls, not the same.

whine whine whine. grumble grumble grumble.

I need a trip. and an expense acct for that trip. sigh. ahh, well, I do have my health. and my kids. and even if they don't appreciate me per se, they still give me hugs and kisses.