Help me thru this sitch

[Pudmuddle]

Yeah, lizzy, I'm trying to read to much into things because he is the type that thinks if we are NOT discussing things about our R that things must be ok, and that drives me batty.

Update: Nothing like a total dis early in the morning...My H came into my bedroom while I was getting ready for work and said he was going to take OW out to a hockey game this sunday and he wanted to take our son...At the time I was so shocked, I just said "You need to do what you need to do". But I was livid underneath...how's that for DB acting??

Anyhoo, after I had time to think about it, it just didn't sit right with me. It seems he is still trying to get our son to believe what he is doing is ok! My S is only 10 yrs old!!!!

So when I got to work I sent him an email and said this

I’ve had some time to absorb this, and I can’t agree with this and here’s why. It seems to me that you are still trying to justify your actions and behavior to your son. I can handle what comes my way with you, but he is only a child and cannot really truly grasp the adultness of this situation. Exposing him to a “relationship” that was based off of lies and deceit is not something I want our son to be exposed to. Like the counselor said we should not dis our spouse to our son or use him as a sounding board. This is exactly what I see as a dis to me by you and it will cause B to favor you once again over me, making him think that I am ok with this, when I am not. Until we are no longer in your life as a family I prefer that you keep the “relationship” to yourself.

Don't know if this was right, but I just had to put my foot down on this one, it just seems so wrong to try and involve our S right now. Especially since the H has made no move to file, move out, or change bills or anything else.

And I was so mad this time, I couldn't even cry. Usually I start leaking at the hint of any R talks, but I guess I am moving on in my heart. I just can't believe this is the man I married and his behaviors just appall me right now. I keep wondering if I really do want to be married to someone who can't handle this well....SIGH.