Saturday, W and I had a Halloween party to go to at her BIL's house. Considering how awkward things have been, I had been considering not going. I had been talking with the woman I met this past weekend and set up dinner with her for Saturday night. Told the W in the morning that I wasn't going to go to the party because I felt like I would feel out of place. She seemed surprised by this, but didn't really ask any questions.
I got a call from my OW (ok, that looks weird) during the day saying that she couldn't make it for dinner. I figured I would just go out myself anyhow. Need to get comfortable with that at some point right? Later in the night when we were both getting ready W asked what I was going to be doing. I told her I didn't really have solid plans. I was just going to go out. She asked if I was going to be seeing the OW, but then said that she had no place in even asking that question.
I left and went out to have some sushi for dinner (alone). As I was paying the bill, W called my cell which I didn’t answer. She then sent a text saying that everyone at the party wanted me to come. Texted her back asking if everyone included her. She said she wanted me to come and hang out. We went back and forth a bit, but I did agree to go. Went home and got my costume on and picked up a few other things and went to the party.
Drank way to much. Nothing significant happened. Pretty neutral I guess. Slept over on the futon with W. I guess I can look at her invitation as positive. She really didn't need to call me and ask me to come.
Hope, I think you can be cautiously optimistic. It is nice that she called you. She could have easily made up excuses to your family why you couldn't come. I'm glad you went and had a good time. I think the more time you spend together having fun is definitely positive. It's like you are able to get away from walking on eggshells for the evening.
Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are. -- Bernice Johnson Reagon
I think its great that you did your own thing, and she called you to join her. yoyo is right, anytime you spend together, relaxing and having fun is always positive.
Hope, I think you can be cautiously optimistic. It is nice that she called you. She could have easily made up excuses to your family why you couldn't come. I'm glad you went and had a good time. I think the more time you spend together having fun is definitely positive. It's like you are able to get away from walking on eggshells for the evening.
Cautiously optimistic is the operative word here. I was thinking the same thing about her not really needing to call so that boosted my moral a bit. All of about two minutes or so.
I got an email from W this afternoon with a link to a local lawyer that does mediation. She wants to set up an appointment with him. I'm sensing that this is the beginning of the end. I hate this feeling, but I also think I will be relieved to put this past us.
Does everyone else on this board get the subtle feedback that there is nothing they can do that is right? I've been feeling that every little misstep I've made in the past week is magnified to fantastic proportions by my W. She seems to have been ultra critical of me recently.
Thanks for the support guys. Glad to hear that I'm not the only one subjected to this.
Asked W last night when our next counseling session is. She said it is next week and I asked if we were still planning on going. Her response was that she really didn't see a need at this point. Feels like we're back to where we were two months ago.
I'm thinking I'll agree to the initial consult with the mediator, but I'm going to talk to my lawyer today to see what suggestions he has. Need to protect my tush at this point.
Tush protecting is important, and might be a small wake up call for W, seeing that you aren't leaving her behind, but aren't leaving yourself behind as well.
W went out with some girlfriends tonight. (really)
Had a pretty good night with the kids, although it was hectic as usual. Karate, dinner, homework, bath, more homework. Not enough time in the night.
W got home earlier than I expected. She came in around 9:30. When she came upstairs, I noticed that her face was red and eyes watery.
Asked her what was wrong and why she had been crying. She didn't want to talk about it and was very vague. I asked a few time and then dropped it. Don't know how to interpret this. Guess I won't drive myself crazy with it.
The next two nights, I'm going to be away on business. Hoping she'll get a chance to miss me.
