When you say no to champagne....

[sage]

My friends,

Thanks for visiting me on my thread and for all the support! This weekend was a good one -- and I really feel as though I was able to incorporate SO much of what I found here -- the concept of "itchy butt", the acting "as if" (I was very successful with that this weekend!), even relaxing a bit from DB'ing with such intensity.

A recap: Got home Friday night to find a note directing me to the bedroom... H was waiting there with champagne! The room was filled with candles! How can I not be crazy about this man? Now, for the BIG news! H. got into law school! He hid the acceptance letter under my pillow! I am SO proud of him -- he's really set this as a goal and went at it full force!

Saturday we spent the morning together meeting with our financial planner. That went well and I felt as though H. and I are back (even better than ever) to focusing on our future -- early afternoon I caught myself "talking over him" -- not interrupting really but he was offering up some really positive thoughts and I stumbled all over myself apologizing for old behaviors and not really letting him get his positive words out -- why do I do this sometimes?

Sunday we ran errands and then relaxed at home for a while. We cuddled on the couch and watched "Rocky" and then I made soup while H. relaxed. We went bowling last night with our league -- H. was tired on the way home and so while I was driving I let myself lapse into my "bad stories about the ow" scenarios which I really hadn't done all weekend! By the time we got home I was so irked and sad about how much lying had gone on...note to self -- STOP these senseless musings! They just piss you off!

Today, well, today H. seems to have a mild case of itchy butt -- or is it me? Mondays are tough days for me because after a weekend of togetherness I return to work and imagine that he and ow run to each other (maybe not literally) to catch up now that "she's" gone (me). I was actually so busy at work today that I didn't spend a lot of time creating negative thought patterns-- but -- I called him a couple of times and he seemed down at first -- my mind went into overdrive (he was hoping it was ow, ow is on call waiting, he just got off the phone with ow, etc) but I acted "as if" and by the end of each conversation, H. seemed more positive! I don't know WHY I have been able to put the "as if" methodology into place these last few days but I have -- H distracted or withdrawn? Must be because he's speechless in his love for me!

--Sage