Okay, I'm sorry, I may be picking a fight here, but I find this offensive. Why would the idea that a relationship might be interracial have to do with anything? (Full disclosure: my xh and I are from different races, different cultures, different countries. My son is multiracial.)
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I'll repeat here the reasons why I believe--and strongly suspect that my XW will concur (at least in part) that I come in ahead of OM.
Stop the comparisons. It'll only make your head hurt. You're trying to approach something in a manner that just won't work.
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I don't know how he did it, but within 3 weeks of responding to a personal ad ... he had my XW spending a long weekend out of town with him.
That is her choice. It's not for you to pass judgment on.
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When I helped her move this summer, I found our wedding photos and a video. To my surprise and disappointment, she moved them to her new storage building without so much as a peek.
This is normal. Maybe they're too painful, maybe she doesn't want to deal with them right now. I've packed mine away, as I just can't deal with it at the moment.
Stop with the idea that you, and only you, are right for your XW. This view will get you no where.
The light interactions are good. Let her still be the one calling you. Keep playing the role of father to your children--that's the most important thing.
Maybe they're too painful, maybe she doesn't want to deal with them right now. I've packed mine away, as I just can't deal with it at the moment.
