ok, been thinking about updating but just haven't made the time:
Things are ok. Sunday was the infamous birthday party. I had finally decided to just throw up my hands and leave it in spouses lap to decide. to make all other parties uncomfortable I offered to both take and pick up DD but spouse had her sister take DD and spouse picked her up when she got off of work. That eve spouse and I were alone and I asked her how SHE felt being at the party - ie - OWs house...she said it was awkward. (really, who'd'a thunk?) She asked me what I thought and I said "it was a path I didn't really want to head down". Spouse said she didn't feel it was a path leading anywhere but just a single event. Overall she knows how I feel and somehow this may bite her in the butt eventually in SOME odd way. That's the only way she'll learn. I told her if DD initiated playtime with OWs children I was against it and would let spouse deal with DD.
Overall things are OK. Spouse continues to see her counselor. Spouse told me sometimes all she can "be is sad" when she thinks of OW and she misses her. (Yep, sad, got it. Imagine how sad you'd be if you tore your family apart...)My gut feeling is:
Either this will work or it won't. We have yet to see how it will shake down. I am about ready to initiate a joint trip to couples therapy. But I thought I'd post something in piecing and get some advice from those in the know. Spouse has not been physical and is still sleeping in her own bedroom.
I have a shovel and I'm not afraid to use it. Stubby
