I don't know if this will matter to you or not, but something that stuck with me about your post is that you told your W that you don't want her to feel guilty.
Do you really not want her to feel guilty? Or did you mean to say that you don't want her to push you away because of her feelings of guilt?
I guess the reason I ask is that it's important to let her have her feelings, but also important that she understand that you aren't holding them against her as far as reconciliation goes. IMO, guilt is an important part of the equation for a WAS to face and work through. I would really worry about the emotional health of a person who feels no guilt, KWIM?
