I know it's going to be hard, but I hope seeing things in black and white will give you some sense of peace: at least you'll know exactly what you're looking at. This is probably the most information you'll have to work with since the whole thing started, and will give you a place to start. I hope.
Just checking in on your sitch. I missed a lot over the weekend. Still no home PC. Vanessa Marcil could't even raise your spirits?
I can't say anything more than whats already been said by the rest of our good pals on here.
My only advice would to be to try and look out for yourself legally, financially and emotionally. Your W may have been the one to file but she does not get to dictate how this will go.
I would certainly speak to an atty to protect yourself and your parental rights. I hate to say it but it seems like people's spots change to stripes when it comes to D.
I don't know the law but I do know from working in financial services that I see a lot accounts being frozen during D proceedings to protect assets for both parties...usually see only joint withdrawals etc until they both sign off on lifting it. Sorry I always think of things from the banking angle due to my profession. I would hate to see you get taken to the proverbial cleaners so she can continue on her carefree, suntanning, shopping and lunching days while you are slaving away to continue to support this woman in the manor to which she has become accustome.
Sorry don't mean to be negative but you seem to work your Arse off while she lives a carefree lifestyle. I wish she could see just how good she has/had it with you in her life.
I would like to see her manage with no full time housekeeper, landscaper and pool boy. Oh and no CVA to keep up with everything else. Probably not the rosey future she is imagining.
Either way, you have movement. You are not in limbo anymore. You know where she stands. You can really start to move forward with your life. Keep GAL, really practive the Ducks Back and keep up the PMA. Easier said than done. But most of all take good care of yourself. Focus on your health and your children.
Me: 30 EX-H: 37 DD: 5 Separated 6/07. MC for months, EX-H quit MC. Divorce Final 8/14/08. Trying to move on with new life.
Thanks everyone Reading thru now. Worst so far is that I cannot enter the premises without permission. How is that possible. How can just serving someone a lawsuit for divorce dictate that I cannot come and go in my own house. I do need to hire an attorney, out of my element on this one.
C
Me: 46 Wife: 39 D: 13 S: 11, 9, 7 Bomb 3.2.07, Sep Same Day, D papers 11.1.07 Current Status - Wants to take me through Discovery, I will go to prison first.
I have no idea how those things go, wonder if it's standard procedure in a D there?
All you lawyers out there, is this a good idea? Ask your W whether she's aware the papers stipulate this and that that you're uncomfortable with. If she's unaware and agrees with you about changes, her L can make them to the papers.
CVA, you guys obviously haven't been able to talk to each other about this kind of thing in the past; maybe with the protection of a D in progress W can relax? But I'm just thinking that approach would be so much more friendly and a hell of a lot cheaper than getting your own L to file a motion, etc etc.
OMG Just read through the custody laws in Texas and there is a code for everything you can think of. Dictates everything.
My W wants the right to determine primary residence of the kids. The literature even points out that this is the most contested point. Her family lives in Dallas and I can already see that coming, despite her "banter" about what is best for the kids, she may try to take them there, dont know yet, that is worst case scenario and only thing I see getting ugly at this point.
C
Me: 46 Wife: 39 D: 13 S: 11, 9, 7 Bomb 3.2.07, Sep Same Day, D papers 11.1.07 Current Status - Wants to take me through Discovery, I will go to prison first.
Oh and WAW, she actually put in the petition that I would pay for all currently contracted maintanence around the house including landscaping. Nice.
Me: 46 Wife: 39 D: 13 S: 11, 9, 7 Bomb 3.2.07, Sep Same Day, D papers 11.1.07 Current Status - Wants to take me through Discovery, I will go to prison first.
So when you say custody laws are dictated, does that mean you have a good idea about what's coming for you re time with the kids?
What would it mean for you if they were living in Dallas? (How far is that from where you are?) Would you see them less frequently?
I wish you had some more time to think about things before dealing with all this, but you may not. I can't imagine how hard it's going to be to separate out your negative feelings for W right now and get to what you really want and what's best for the kids instead of wanting to hurt her. Do you think you can do it?
Dallas is unacceptable, hell, the other side of Houston is unacceptable, or even more than a few miles away! I love my kids so much and want so much for them including a full time dad (me) that I will do everything in my power to make that happen.
The laws can be strict if the court has to decide if we cannot work it out. I am confident I can talk to her about this and get it settled.
I really have no other feelings for W other than extreme disappointment in somebody I love / loved that is just giving up.
C
Me: 46 Wife: 39 D: 13 S: 11, 9, 7 Bomb 3.2.07, Sep Same Day, D papers 11.1.07 Current Status - Wants to take me through Discovery, I will go to prison first.
