May be I will be helpful may be I will be not but I also found out when the worst ( I also found out about the PA) was happening that my H had another email account he wasn't telling me about. I was not as strong as you and confronted him right away. He told me that he did not want remains of his past actions bothering me again since he could receive emails from the cyber affairs. I have learned that he was sincere. By the time I was snooping I found some cyber communications he wasn't replying back to 3 months ago and was still getting emails.
In the end I gave up, I can tell you, I work also with Information Technology, I can snoop quite professionally and have the resources to do so. But I've just rationalized to myself that there are thousands of email accounts he could sign up to. He gave me his passwords but I will have to snoop forever to learn if he set other accounts others than the two he gave me full access. He canceled one and the one he kept I don't even feel like snooping. You know why? Because it's useless.
That's where the first test goes in, I guess. You can and is entitled to ask for honesty on what you know. But that does not guarantee you much.(That's why Sara is so right)
So may be you should give yourself a break and wait to see how things settle in. By now, you are wise about the signs. Take LWB and Yoyo's advice and let him do his thing, spontaneously.
You have already come this far. I am not telling you to be on denial but keep the faith in yourself and in your achievements.
