Calling Mr.IC.....talk to me please !

[Kettricken]

Lil, everything you've said here is some of the wisest stuff I've ever read. Thank you for being willing to put your past pain to such wonderful use.

IC and Miss IC -- ((((((( both of you )))))))

I don't think it's strictly a male thing to try to deal with really scary sh*t by one's self as long as possible. (Although all those garbage "be a good little soldier/toughen up" messages we seem to give boys probably do predispose them that way.) There's something about sharing something major with your mate that gives it a weightier reality .... something about seeing the impact on them makes the real even realer, if that makes sense. So we refuse to let them look at the monster for as long as possible -- perhaps in hope that it might just possibly prove to have been some dreadful mistake and go away. Yes, it's stupid, a dysfunctional dance. But very human. IC, forgive yourself; you don't need guilt weighing on you right now. Miss IC ... you too. Neither of you are alone.