Ellie, your post caught my eye because of the OW issue. My story if you care is also here on "Piecing" it's titled 'bomb dropped 2/21' and may be on page 4 by now. Anyway, EA-OW is still in the picture here, although H still insists she was/is only friend. They email each other now and I really hate it. He doesn't know that I know this and I can read them too. The thing is he lies about this, he tells me he hasn't written to her when I know he has because I've seen the emails. I was really disturbed yesterday when I read that he wrote to her "missin ya" (she wrote first that she missed him) and signed it 'LD', the L being for love and D is his first initial. Naive that I guess I am I thought those LD's were reserved for me. The thing is I know he never sees her because he is always home when he is supposed to be and always at work when he is supposed to be and he wouldn't have her come there because it is a very small company and everyone knows ME. He'd get busted. It's the lying that is driving me crazy. He looks me right in the eye and lies to me. Other than all of that he is loving and attentive and very affectionate towards me. He doesn't want a D anymore. he told me he loved me last month, but as far 'being in love' he doesn't know what that is anymore. I killed it good in him. This is a complete 180 from what he was telling me a year ago. Then , he told me he held out no hope for us at all. Sorry to hijack your post. Lisa
Ellie, he swears up and down that it is nothing, that he does not want a D from me, holds me like there is no tomorrow. I did get it out in the open the other night, not as far as him knowing I can read his emails though. He tells me our sit. is so much better than it used to be. I do have a habit of over reacting to way too much stuff. we talked again a little yesterday and he told me he was M to me, sleeps with me and does not have time for an affair and doesn't want one. Your response of it sounding like it is starting up again, funny thing is it was always one sided, his side and I guess I should be glad about that because if she had encouraged him I think my job would have been a lot harder. If I asked him if it was starting up again he's say there is noting to start back up. Her emails to him are very benign and generic. There haven't been any calls between them on his cell phone for months. I will keep my eyes wide open. Lisa
Lisa - if things are that good, then why not tell him you know about the emails and you expect them to stop. There is no reason for him to continue communicating with her and as long as he is he is keeping one toe outside the door of the marriage. He wouldn't be very happy about it if the shoe were on the other foot, would he?
you know, I have told him that very thing, what if this were completely turned around, how would he feel. He agreed. I'm not ready yet to tell him I've been snooping though. I even wrote to Michelle about this, she told me to lighten up about it. H told me this OP is not loyal to him at all too. I had hoped that as H and I got closer that his "need" for her would dwindle. She's got so much baggage, even H has said that and a 4 year old daughter and I know and he has said too that he doesn't want to go back to that now that our kids are almost 15 and 18. Time for more prayers I guess.
Hi all. Picked up SIL from airport today, had lunch with her before taking her to hotel where she's meeting her H on a business trip. I had assumed that MIL would have told her something of our sitch, but turns out she knew nothing at all, so ended up filling her in during our lunch. UGGGHH! Didn't enjoy reliving all of that!
She was great, though, very supportive - and at least the story has a happy ending
H is gone tonite to LA - I get to join him there tomorrow night.
Today is my "off" day from training - actually feel a little antsy, believe it or not!
