neph, glad you talked to someone. just stay the heck away from that evil woman, okay. take care of yourself, take care of your kids. (((HUGS))) how dare your h do this to you. I'm sorry, that just makes me so mad I could spit.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
neph your friend is right, you can be arrested, but the cops would have to be *really* bored on a night to do it. Stay home, no calls, no emails, no nothing. Your H is already regretting what he did. If what you have posted is all you have done (I didn't know about any voice mails), then they are being ridiculous. OW is LOVING the fact that your H is siding with her, so stop letting her have the control. Show everyone you are above this mess, and leave everyone alone.
So sorry neph, you did not need this, but its happened and you can handle it.
Nep, A traffic ticket is a misdemeanor. I would say just stay away. Do not call, do not drive by don’t even mention the OW to your H. (H may say something to her) I would not worry at this point. Now the next step will be more serious. If you break the restraining order. Call the department on Monday. People sometimes say things in anger that they really do not mean. Others don't know that it was said in anger and not meant as a threat. If the police did nothing and you did do something they would be held responsible so they are just following procedures at this time.
Back off take a breath and let H come to you. If you see BF or OW even in a store turn around and Walk away
Husband
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
Yes, my H is playing both sides. He called me Wed night and told me OW was going to go after me. He said he had no control over it "these people don't care who you are or that you have kids." Then he goes with her to file the report?
I let him get to me. The sex messed me up. H saying he was going to come home Wed after work messed me up. When I found out that he was living with her after he said it was over, it was like I went right back to day one. All the pain and the sense of betrayal came back full force.
He doesn't want me. He doesn't want our family. I don't know why he still lies to me at this point.
This recent betrayal is too deep. Even the small possibility that I may be taken from my children for even one night is unforgivable. He is protecting, defending, and supporting her when he should be protecting us from her.
I am no longer trying to save my marriage. I am now trying to survive my marriage.
I will be handling this matter with the police on Monday. Then I will be filing for a D.
Me29 H33 D9 months S2 S9(previous R) Sep 8-19-07 I file 11-5-07 H home (Retro) 2-15-08 "Today is the tomorrow of yesterday." -- S9
OMG I wish I read what happened to you before I sent that nasty voicemnail. But the purge!1 iam so glad I purged trhe anger from my system. How is it that we all had to get the anger out? What is up with us this week/ yaya Sisterhood or something!
Me:38 H:39 MLC M:10 R:23 years D6 S3 Bomb: Easter, 2007 "Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day."
neph, I think you are right. you are trying to survive. take care of yourself. stay away from them. try to sleep, try to eat, focus on that and on your children. let us know what happens on monday.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
Yup, I hear you. Things seem to go in cycles around here.
The more I think about it, the more I feel that Monday will be fine. I am not a threat to her in any way. The cops are not stupid. The one I spoke to on Friday said he was there when H and OW came. He didn't take the report, but he overheard everything. He saw through them. He said it was obvious. He told me not to worry too much--just be compliant when you come here, tell them what you have told me, and everything will be fine. He said he used to be a detective and handle these things. He wouldn't charge me with anything, if it was him. This is a matter that should be handled between the three of us, not wasting the court's time.
I didn't threaten her in any way. The only "threat" was to expose her and my H and ruin her reputation.
My H punched me in the face, did permanent damage to my mouth, and his charges got dropped. Of course, I didn't press charges. They are trying to press charges on me. They are going out of their way to try to get me in trouble.
I think it would have looked better for her if she had gone alone. The fact that my H was there with her made it obvious to law enforcement what was going on. Hopefully the detective I speak to will be of the same mind set.
Me29 H33 D9 months S2 S9(previous R) Sep 8-19-07 I file 11-5-07 H home (Retro) 2-15-08 "Today is the tomorrow of yesterday." -- S9
Five years ago today, my H sat me down and told me he wanted more than to just date. He wanted us to be exclusive. Monogamy was very important. If I wanted to continue seeing him, I would have to stop seeing anyone else (There was one other person I had been dating off and on when I met H). We both made that committment that day.
Now look at where we are. It is astounding how quickly things change. Seven months ago, I was giving birth to a baby with my H by my side. Now he is living with someone else trying to put me in jail without regard for the children we created together.
Today is also the anniversary of my sister's death. I will be going to see her today.
I will get through this. Somehow, I will get through this. I have to get through this. I have to.
Me29 H33 D9 months S2 S9(previous R) Sep 8-19-07 I file 11-5-07 H home (Retro) 2-15-08 "Today is the tomorrow of yesterday." -- S9
I am so sorry about your sister. It is not healthy for you to dwell on the depth of his betrayal of you. I think he is trying to get back at you in his small way for sending him to jail, even if you did drop the charges. Of course, you did the right thing, no man should hit a woman. And there need to be harsh consequences if he does. You did nothing beyond a normal display of anger and the legal system will recognize it. But do not underestimate his change of heart. He is completely gone, and other than support issues, you need to be done with this man too. He will only bring you trouble and more trouble.
