new here. Feel like dying

[cat03]

I think she is already down Dom, don't think she needs any more grief.

ladybug, my H is back with me, and even now he still is wondering if things will truly work out, the good thing is that you admit your faults, I was also disrespecting along with nagging and not putting my H first. Even as you become a better person your H will be doubtful for a while.

Also, you need to change for YOU first, then the change will be truly genuine. See yourself as you've never seen yourself before, ask yourself "if my S behaved the way I have, would I have been happy?"

I know things get harder when the kids come, when we as women give them our full attention and assume our Hs will "understand". For the longest time I never did want to understand that children are an addition to the marriage, not its core, your H should b first and you should be first in your H's eyes.

Please read the books I recommended, you need a plan of action to move forward, I know the pain is blinding, but you must fight now, fight your fear, you can be brave, I have faith you can, I will be praying for you, only God got me through, sometimes we have to go through trials by fire to become better people.