While living in the same house, you should not 'go dark' right now. My counselor always told me 'Nurture what you have'.
The 'intimacy' thing: If she offers, do it. Never 'debate' or question like you did the other night. All you're doing is showing her how much she doesn't have 'those feelings'. And how much of a waffler you are. Women want men to be decisive.
In fact, don't debate anything any more. Listen and validate while also being real, and setting boundaries.
Don't become her 'girlfriend' by letting her talk to you about everything. As we like to say, 'man up'
Go to 'makingherhappy.com' and sign up for the free e-mails. There are also some links to free e-books. They are usually at the end of the e-mails. He also has archives online. You need to understand what a woman needs to feel 'that feeling'.
regarding the anniversary:
I bought a 'write your own' card and wrote the following:
"I will always cherish the memory of this special day 15 years ago. You gave me two beautiful daughters to love for the rest of my life. I'm eternally grateful for all the good times we spent together. I hope we both find the life we are searching for"
