HFF, What have you two been working on in the marital counseling sessions?
The counselor has been focusing on my W's childhood and seems to think that her problems stem from this. My problem is that we haven't been working on the hear and now. How do we go forward and fix things in the present. I understand the past has a big impact on your personality, but I almost think this is best left to IC. I've suggested a different counselor. W said that she would go, but really didn't think it would make a difference and doesn't want to work on things now. She has resolved to ending it.
Quote:
You've got to operate from a position of strength. You seem like you've been knocked down and can't get up.
Decide if you want to fight for this M or not. If you do then start taking care of yourself--exercise, connection, cultivating a positive attitude. Your worth as a human being is not dependent on your W.
I think I am finding my strength more so now. I have detached and am working on making myself happy. She has seen the changes and commented on that. I know that I will be happy without her as my W. I know I don't need her to make me happy.
Quote:
Are you reading Divorce Remedy? This is the foundation book for dealing with a marital crisis.
CL
Have read and reread Divorce Busters. Have tried most of the techniques with little or no results. There was a point where she had turned around and seemed committed to working on things, but she has completed turned around at this point.
