Now I've done it...again #5

[nephartiti]

The no kissing thing started post bomb, but pre-separation. Sex got less and less intimate. When we ML a few weeks ago, it was fab. I don't know what his deal is now.

Sara, no he is not on drugs or alcohol. His job is his top priority. That is where OW is.

Thanks, MK. You are right, of course. I wish I had gotten on here and read your post earlier. Maybe I would have not obsessed so much last night.

I am beginning to think this whole sitch with H has a lot more to do with me than I realized. I know I have been struggling with depression since my baby. So H found a "friend". Of course, that was not the best way for him to handle things. Of course I responded negatively, but I think my own insecurities, along with the depression, really exasperated the sitch. They fed off each other. Does that make sense? This, of course, pushed H farther away from me and closer to OW.

I know everyone on these boards struggles with obsessive thoughts and may act out a little. I think of the things I've done, and I just cringe. Before anyone acts, heed the following as a warning.

I went to the school one day and looked through the yearbook. I didn't think it was that big of a deal at the time, but apparantly, it has caused quite an uproar. Someone from the student store called the office and said someone was looking at pics of the teachers (I obviously wasn't a student or a teacher). One of the VP's stopped me in the hall and pulled me in his office to find out why I was there. It was quite an interrogation. Anyway, I guess OW felt very threatened that I was there. The school sent a letter stating that I was no longer allowed on campus. OK, fine.

Now that I showed up at her apartment to see my H, I am hearing that I am "harrassing" her. Aparrently, as a teacher, she is under special protection by the state and is considering pressing charges. Yikes. Plus, in the beginning of our sitch, when I was first confronting H about the phone bill, he forwarded a v-mail I left him to her where I told him something like "You better come clean and tell me who this is or you better believe I will be calling this number (on the bill) over and over until I get to the bottom of this. I will harrass them. I will find out." Her BF called me once after that threatening me with a restraining order. It is a "threat" to harrass her. She has made it very clear that she still has that message recorded along with a few others that were less than appropriate that I left in weak moments. So she is making a case against me. H called and told me about it, but he says he is staying out of it.


It isn't against the law for her to help break up my family, but it is against the law for me to retaliate. So, although these OP cause immense damage to us and our families, we must mind our manners and protect ourselves. If you are going to call and tell them off, do not leave a v-mail. Do not e-mail. Do not leave a trail at all. It is better not to call at all, but if you do, let it be their word against yours.