Now I've done it...again #5

[nephartiti]

Thanks Casey. I think you may be right on a lot of the above points. However, I am pretty sure it as become physical. I don't know for sure though. What I do know is that he is borderline delusional and he is obsessed with her. He runs everything by her. It is disgusting. I think she plays a mother role for him.

I am tired of waiting for him. I am tired of carrying all the weight and getting nothing but lies in return. I am tired of having to carry two sleeping babies inside by myself. He has entered into a rapid downward spiral, and I don't know if he is ever coming out.

I think I am done. I'm thinking of filing. Maybe I'll wait till after the holidays. A couple of months won't make a difference at this point.

I am angry right now. Can you tell?

I was stupid this morning. I really cut things short earlier. When he woke up, he came into the bedroom and ende up laying next to me. Of couse he started to initiate sex. I was all for it, but realized he was back to his "no kissing" bs and was keeping his face turned away (even though he was initiating) so I just stopped. I said "O'm sorry. I just can't do this." He apologized and we just held each other for a while. Then he started again, but still no kissing. I didn't say anything, but I just stopped. I just can't go there with him. I felt used.

Before he got out of the car he said he would be by later tonight. Of course he changed his mind.

I'm just tired and only having one hour of sleep isn't helping.

The kids had fun Trick Or Treating. Thank God for these precious ones. They keep me smiling