I went overboard, unfortunately, early on with these events..bdays, wedding ann., etc....probably best to only acknowledge the day with a simple card. No ILYs. This will send a clear message to her that you know she isn't taking care of you or the relationship and you acknowlege and therefore, no fanfare over what in the past were important events. She's on another planet....a sweet, loving card will most likely just make her feel bad because it will show her you are clueless as to how she is treating you. She knows what she's doing. She probably just wishes she were somewhere else right now.
For me, it was so important to find out about the EA so then I could simply stop doing anything for the relationship and make plans to move on......everytime I think about asking her to dinner or call her, I think of the information that I have on her activities and just go do something else because I am now a nobody in her life and that's just fine with me.
I hope he gets her! Then he can deal with all the trouble and deception and bad attitudes!
