another bomb is dropped

[Jen_Jam]

Be careful ... I had the advice "it's about time he got his backside in gear" and it was wrong, wrong...

But...it depends on how you approach W. As a help to the separation, maybe it will open her eyes up a little. A kind of "maybe it would be a good idea to get a job, especially as we're soon going to have spearate households, what do you think?" .. involve her as part of the solution, not part of the problem.

I also had an alarm bell when you said W reckons that you are OK with splitting up. You're not. I don't think it's bad DB to point out that you don't want to split but if that is the only thing which will make her happy then you won't stand in her way.

(PS glad your wilder days didn't involve drugs, I wouldn't recommend them to anyone)