lwb, yeah, I have lonely moments, too, don't get me wrong. but I have more moments when i really and truly am just fine, happy even, when I am alone.
no, not how I wanted to live my life, but I drew the short straw when it came to marriage partners, so that's that.
saffie, I miss being pissed at my h for no real reason. lol. I do. but even if there is a reason, make sure you tell him why. funny that he was so shocked, but good that you told him.
mk, love the image of the cute man. the other day this euro-type, about 10 years older than me, was at the grocery store and gallantly (I do not use that word lightly, btw) pulled out a produce bag and opened it for me when I was heading toward the pears. he was really sweet, actually, cute about it. hey, maybe I'm not such a troll. not my type, not interested, but nice to just have something nice done, isn't it?
thanks for the broken home stuff. that's why I had the pics done, btw....we are a new family I guess. the kids and I make a pretty good team. are we gilmore girls? no. probably more like dan in real life and his girls...hopefully with me being a bit less overprotective.
hey, and i like the idea of kissing a man someday. I like the idea of those butterflies and that first kiss and all the loveliness of it. someday. with someone who deserves my kisses, not someone who threw me away like garbage.
having a back and forth day. mostly fine, mostly reflective, still find my mind wandering to stuff I need to block for a bit (memories and such). even recent stuff like when he was chasing me around the car trying to seduce me and such and saying maybe this would help bring us closer and such. its all kind of running thru my mind a bit. but I need to stop it for now. can go back to that stuff someday, when I am more detached and such. but for now, well, I need to realize this is who he is and what he wants, and enough about him anyway, lets concentrate on me.
its been a busy day here, and obviously will only get busier. the twins and I made a pumpkin pie while S5 was in school (a halloween tradition). costumes are pretty much ready to go, think we're going to head outside now for a bit and run around for a bit. its gorgeous out, and actually warmer outside than in (my house stays really cold when it gets cold...too much open space, too much hard flooring). I'm going to be useful and clean out the shed. normally h's domain. I'm going to pull everything out and make sense of it finally once and for all.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
