Check out Make up or Break up, that was a good book that talked about childhood issues. And I agree with you about trying to be positive, but sometimes you just have to say what you need to. I personally default on the positive because that is the type of person I am, but even last Wednesday I had a screaming match with H, so sometimes you just have to stand up for yourself. (My mother gave me some great advice on this: I told her that I was constantly worried whether I was "handling" our situation correctly--Afraid that if I did one approach over the other it may be wrong. She said that H has done so many missteps that it is ok if I do some as well, I just do what my heart feels). I have read so many books and have a lot of information swarming in my head that I believe I am taking that and what my heart believes and just doing.
Do what you need to do, Butterfly. But, I definitely believe in taking the time until you are SURE you are ready to go through w/ D. I know too many people around our ages that jumped ship b/c of parental pressure, internal pressure and are now wondering if it was the right decision to D.
Keep us updated..
H & I, both 32, together since 18. *M 7/03, A since 9/06. Bomb 7/07, H ended it w/ OW 9/08 * Agreed to D 6/09...very hard *D 8/10 * At peace, have become great friends w/ X-H and his new GF
